Oh! Come On! Seriously?
by Azami14
Summary: I know there are a lot of these but I wanted to put my own ideas out there, yup. A girl from our world gets attacked... or was it she attacked first..? Anyway, she's all of a sudden in stuck in the Narutoverse and she has to save someone. But who? How will she deal with the stupidity of the Konoha citezens? And Duck-ass! No! Crap summary I know, but the story's way better!
1. Where the Hell Am I

!PLEASE READ DO NOT SKIP PLEASE!

AN: People of Earth! It is I! Your Savior Azami! Okay so people, anyone really, this is my first Fanfiction, I am experimenting and trying to figure out what works. I'm well aware that I'm not the best writer but please, no Flamers or Trolls (I did a report on the history of social networking and did you guys know that the Flame and Troll Wars started in 1978 when two guys from Chicago started a small virtual community?) but seriously. Also, it's not diagnosed but I'm pretty sure I'm bipolar and it shows in my stories. I have the attention span of a nat so don't get super attached to my stories cause I will more than likely take a 22 and kill a lot of them. I'm also in the middle of Hell on Earth known better as high school so sometimes it will take a while for updates, however I will try and make it up to you all and will ask for suggestions. Umm datz it guys. For more info look at my Bio or something. To the future!

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><p>"'Mira! Get your lazy ass outta bed! It's two in the afternoon!" The banshee screamed.<p>

"Ma I'm tired I don't wanna~!" I whined halfheartedly, while I turn off my Ipod and hide it, just in case. I know in the end I'm going to be cleaning something, while she screams at me how lazy I am, this is routine really. The only reason I'm complaining is because I have a quota to fill.

"You've been asleep for 12 hours! Get up! Get up! Get up!" She yells, barging into my room. In reality I've been up since six alternating between reading and watching Naruto… For the eighth time. I'm a super-mega-otaku/narutard-freak and I know, aren't I too old for cartoons? My answer to that would either be 'HN, THEY'RE NOT CARTOONS! THEY'RE ANIME! AND NARUTO WILL BECOME HOKAGE! BELIEVE IT! SHANNARO! AND TOBI IS A GOOD BOY, UN!' or if I'm in a mood, 'Who the fuck are you, my mother?' anyways.

"But mom I'm a teenage and I need sleep~!" I said in my sleepy/whiny voice. I really love my room and my bed and my curtains for many reasons. One would be that I kinda am lazy, another would be the fact that I don't like interacting with my family or people in general for that matter. I love reading and watching anime, especially the fantasy genre because it's _fantasy_ it's not real, reality is cruel. People are cruel. God is cruel. In fact were it not for the fact that I want to believe that _they _were someplace happy I would have stopped believing in him.

"What you need is exercise. Get up, get showered, and dressed I need to go to the store." She said slapping a sticky note to my forehead. I mumbled curses and death threats under my breath.

"But ma, I'm not old enough to drive without a parent." I said, I'm only 16 which technically in the State of Alaska is old enough but I only have a permit, didn't pass the damn test.

"Oh no! It's a good thing you have legs then, isn't it." She said mockingly. I ripped the sticky off my forehead and read it.

"Now I know you've lost it. I can't carry all this stuff home mom, it's too much." I said relieved, there's no way she'd actually make me carry all this stuff home.

"Oh you'll be fine, you're strong, my little heavy-weight boxer girl, rise and shine~." She said the last part in sing-songy voice as she left my room. I sat there staring at the door. You could almost see the loading bar above my head. 87%... 93%... 99%... WHAT. DAFUQ. I flailed in my bed, grabbing pillows and throwing them around while muttering incoherent things about mothers and death.

"I WILL RISE, BUT I REFUSE TO SHINE!" I yell vehemently while sitting up and clenching my fist, flames in my eyes. I then proceeded to roll out of bed, making an 'oof' sound as I hit the floor. I picked myself up went to my closet and picked out the clothes I would wear. A black spaghetti strap tank and a black pullover hoodie with the words 'God wants me dead' printed on the front. I then went to my drawers and pulled out a pair of plain black short shorts, bundling them up with my other clothes. I robotically marched to the bathroom and took a shower.

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><p>Half an hour later I had finished my shower, got dressed, brushed my teeth, blow dried, brushed, and tied up my mid-length, wavy, black as midnight hair. Still one-fourth of the time my little sister used to take. She used to take a whole hour just brushing her hair. I walked down to the entry way with my wallet, Ipod and the sticky and put on my grey vans. I know what you're thinking, this girl loves her rainbow. Yes, I love it very, very much. I opened the front door and chilly September air rushed in. 'It'll be <em>that <em>time soon.' I thought, my bangs covering my murky brown eyes. I walked out of the house and closed the door, making my way to Carrs. Carrs was about seven blocks from where I live, it's kinda cold but my hoodie is thick enough. While walking I decided to pull my hood up, I had my Ipod in my pocket so I took the earbuds and wrapped them around my ears. I didn't turn the music on. To others, I looked like a sorta-tall-sorta-short girl because of the way I was hunching, who wasn't paying attention to the things around her. In truth, I was a tall-for-my-age, heavy-weight boxer and kick boxer on the side, who knew that she was being followed by a couple of teenage drop-outs. You get where this is going, no? I lazily turned a corner down one of the non-paved side streets, keeping my head down. I could almost hear the fuckaz smirking at their apparent luck. Yeah, fucking right. I quickly ducked behind some trash cans, and thankfully they didn't see me do it because next I hear is,

"Fuck, where'd she go?!" I'm naming him Thing One. The Asshole.

"I dunno man come on lets look for her." Thing Two. The Prick. As soon as they went to pass the trash cans I quickly kicked the closest one in the knee joint, hearing a nice snapping sound followed by his scream, he went down. I then tackled who I was assuming to be Thing One, to the ground. I straddled him and started beating down on him. What I didn't expect was for Thing Two to get up behind me and start choking me out. I promptly stopped punching Thing One and tucked my chin down, opening my airway a little. Then I grabbed one of his hands and peeled it off twisting it as hard as I could. He screamed and let me go. I stood up coughing really hard. Maybe I bit off more than I could chew. So I speed walked, away from the scene. But then I tripped. I know I tripped, how embarrassing! I expected to faceplant in the mud, but I just kepted falling and falling and falling. The last thing I remember was screaming "WHAT THE FUCK!"

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><p>The next thing I know is I can't see, I can't feel, taste, or smell. It's like I'm just floating around no where.<p>

_Save them… Please… save them… If you save them… I'll grant you three wishes… deal? _

'Who the fuck are you, the genie?' I thought, seeing as I couldn't speak.

_No…_ Was all it/he/she said.

'Well are ya gonna tell me who ya are?' I thought, slightly irritated.

_No… Do we have a deal? _The voice asked.

'That depends on many things, like where am I, when do I get these "wishes", what can I wish for, who I have to "save", how you expect me to save them, ex-fucking-cetra?!'

_...Your mother did a poor job with your manners…_ That's it, this bitch.

'So fucking sorry my mom died when I was eight!' I really don't want to admit it, but I was kinda scared, no way in all of burning Hell was voicy gonna know that, though.

_But… you were just talking with your mother… she sent you to the store…_ Voicy said, confused.

'Nope, that's my foster mother who is forcing me to call her "mother", the bitch.' I sneered.

_Enough of this! We are running out of time! You're in The Mirror, you can have one wish along the way when I deem fit, anything but resurrection, you'll figure it out when you're there, and that's something you have to figure out. _Voicy said. _Do we have a deal?_ Sure why the fuck not? I'm bored, sure I'll take a vaca from school and picky teachers, the banshee, all those assholes.

'Sure.' I thought. Whatever I just want to see again.

_Thank you…_ It said and faded away. It suddenly got very cold, then I face planted into dirt and was knocked out.

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><p>Okay… So… How was it? Question Mark!? Was it too short? Or something? Please tell me! Anyway, I kinda want this to be an OCxNeji or maybe OCxKakashi but NEVER OCxDuck-Ass just letting ya know. Oh and let me tell you… there WILL be SASSGAY bashing, slashing and hacking 'cuz he is retarded and like... GOD don't get me started, I'll probably rant about it next time, same with FUJAIKING-SAKURA-RETARDED-FANGIRL-DIE-DIE-DIE! Because I loathe people who do use common sense. Anyway, who do you think should be paired with our little fighta girl? Should I do a poll? OKAY DAZ IT GUYS R&amp;R<p>

-_-_-Azami-_-_- OUT!


	2. SING

AN: In honor of my first reviewer I decided to add another chapter because rewards inspire good behaviour… yep. Also, it has come to my attention that I should wait for pairings. I will not ignore this advice… Pairings you shall wait! So… yeah since it's the same day I'm just gonna roll the camera. To the future!

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><p>"Ugh… The hell am I?" Face. Pain. Oww… I lifted my head up and it was really dark and cold and SHIFTY SHADOWS EVERYWHERE! I shot up and spun around. I couldn't hear the usual whispers, really where am I. I felt something wet drip down my face. Call me gross but I just licked it. Metallic, coppery, a little salty… Yup, it's blood. Damn it. I used my sleeve as a tissue since I didn't have anything else, I really wanted to see so I dug in my pocket for my Ipod. OH. GOD. NOOOOO! In my hand rested a snapped in half Ipod… Que anime tears.<p>

"Nooooo! Not my Ipod! I did triple chores for a year to earn that!" I ranted at no one. Sigh. Rest in peace Ipod. My nose hurts. I'm cold. Just realized I'm hungry. I don't know where I am. Ipod's dead. The Banshee's gonna be pissed when I get back. Tired, tired, tired, tired. Bored, bored, sleep...

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><p>"What do you think she's doing here?" A deep voice whispered, but I could hear him loud and clear. It's kind of annoying I want to sleep~.<p>

"I don't know, do you think she's a spy?" A girly voice asked. Yes, because a 16 year old girl can totally be a spy in this day and age. Now let me sleep!

"Her nose is all bloody, do you think she got in a fight?" Yes a fight with the dirt patch over there, knocked me out pretty damn good, aren't you fools gonna take to the hospital or something? I felt a tug on my hoodie, like right on my boob… So I what any girl would do. I screamed.

"What do you think this say-"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I shot up and slugged the guy in front of me who was crouched down. He looked almost exactly like Asuma from Naruto, heck he was even wearing the vest. Just behind him was Kurenai's doppelganger, eyes wide in shock.

"The hell man! Pedophile! Rape! Rape! R-A-P-E Please get your dick outta me!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I then made a swift exit to stage right. Asuma-look-alike was holding his nose on his rear shock still. Kurenai-look-alike's eyes were the size of saucers. I tried diving around them but before I could make the leap someone wrapped an arm around my waist and I found myself pressed against a mans chest. I continued to scream,

"HEY! Don't touch me there! That is my no-no square!" At this point I'm hyperventilating.

"Calm down! Please, no one is trying to rape you!" The guy said, couldn't see his face.

"He touched my boob, while I was sleeping, and now your arm is like right fucking on top of my boobs! Get off! Get off! Get off! Or I'll be forced to sing!" I yelled trying to break free.

"Sing?" He asked. Not. Moving. Arm.

"Kakashi! My Eternal Rival! Remove your arm this instant, you fiend!" A guy wearing a green… spandex… suit… with… bowl cut… and BIG FREAKIN EYEBROWS! Yelled. "Kakashi's arm did not move so… with practiced speed I elbowed him in the stomach as hard as I could,

"Solar Plexus~" I stomped on his right foot.

"Instep~" I sang as I as I elbowed his nose.

"Nasal~" At this point he has let go of me so I spun around and kicked him in the groin.

"And Groin~" I then added my own extra as he bent down for his balls I grabbed his head and pulled down and I kneed him in the face. Then I dove behind the nearest tree. Everyone was staring at a downed man with silver hair. Now I feel bad for beating up an old guy. The feeling went away as the guy who looked like Maito Gai from Naruto shot to "Kakashi" and helped him up. "Kakashi" was holding his crotch and nose and was clearly in pain. He could only be in his 20's. Staring at me with large eyes were almost exact copies of Asuma, Kurenai, Kakashi, and Gai. I stared right back.

"What the hell!?" I yelled. Was I at Senshi Con or something!?

"What the hell is right, what is wrong with you?!" Kakashi yelled/gasped.

"You were molesting me!" I shot back. Pedophile.

"No I wasn't!" Kurenai chose that moment to come back to us.

"You kinda were, Kakashi…" She said. I scanned them again, their cosplay was really good it almost looked real. Wait. Where's Gai!?

"HELLO MOST YOUTHFUL MAIDEN WHO HAS DEFEATED MY ETERNAL RIVAL KAKASHI!" Came a shout from behind me.

"Gai! You're scaring her even more!" Kurenai yelled at him. I was shaking, my eyes wide. I couldn't process all this. First Voicy, then painful battle with the ground, I broke my Ipod, had to sleep outside in the cold, while hungry, then I got molested by Asuma cosplayer, then Kakashi cosplayer whose ass I just kicked, and now G-Gai is behind me. I know he's not really Gai, it's not possible. But my body was so worked up that it decided to shut down. The shifty shadows closed in and the last thing I remembered was someone catching me.

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><p>"When I woke up I was in a familiar room. White. Everywhere. I hated it. I needed out of the sickening, suffocating, <em>sad <em>room. I felt something in my arm. I looked down and my eyes widened at the sight, the heart monitor picked up fast. Needles. A big one sticking out of my arm. Images of _their_ faces, _their_ bodies stuck full of needles. I let out a built up shriek and tried yanking it out. It hurt, and then blood started leaking out of the hole. Blood. More images of the pooling blood around _their_ bodies. I kept screaming. A nurse burst in and at this point I had shoved myself off the bed trying to get away from the needle and the blood. She rushed over to me and tried to get me to calm down, but I wouldn't hear it. I screamed and screamed. Until another nurse came back with a needle. The first nurse held me down while the second injected me with it. I soon fell asleep.

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><p>When I woke up the second time there was no needle in my arm, I guess they learned. I could hear voices outside my room.<p>

"When I came in she was on the floor screaming her head off, I don't know why." The feminine voice said.

"I see. Do you know where she's from?" A rumbly, old voice asked.

"No idea. She didn't have a hitai-ate on her, but she could have gotten rid of it." Kakashi.

"Hmm…" The old voice said, "Why don't we go ask her?"

"Sorry sir, she won't be waking up for at least another three hours, probably more." The nurse said.

"Nonsense, she's already awake." The old voice said as he opened the door.

"How?" The nurse asked, shocked. In the doorway stood Kakashi cosplayer, nurse, and Old Man Hokage cosplayer. The hokage smiled at me disarmingly. I do not fall for that shit. So I just stared back.

"My name is Sarutobi Hiruzen, I am Hokage of Konoha. What is your name, dear?" He asked kindly. Blink once. Blink twice. Ain't no way in hell he's getting my real name.

"Thunda." I say. It's almost true, the kids at school call me that and I answer to it so I don't see a problem. He just stared at me before nodding, he knows.

"So, Thunda… Where are you from?" I guess I can answer that.

"Anchorage, Alaska." I replied. He blinked.

"Young lady this is not some joke, I let your name slide, but really where are you from." He said in a kind but commanding voice.

_This is not a joke, this is real… You have to save them… this is serious… _And like that Voicy had come and gone. Well joy. Loading bar is a go, 67%... 79%...98%... Oh! Come on! Seriously!? I was dropped into Naruto!? I feel a migraine coming on. It's official. I'm gonna die.

"I'm waiting." He said. Well, it's now or never.

"The Land of Tea." I said. He smiled at that.

"So what were you doing sleeping in the forest?" Damn it! Think. Think! Use you brain Amira! Truth. Just tell the truth. At least a half truth.

"I was being attacked by some men, they chased me and I ended up here." I said, half truth, take the bait! Please take the bait! He stared at me, at my eyes like he was looking for a lie. I stared back. He sighed.

"Thunda, would you like to be a ninja of Leaf?" He asked. On the inside I fell. Is this dude for real? He probably just wants to tabs on me the ninja way, whatever the hell that means. I pretended to think about it.

"No." I said. Everyone looked at me in shock. What? Oh, is it bad to like breathing? I wanna live!

"Are you sure? Why don't you think about it a while?" He asked still stunned.

_WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I'M MANIPULATING HIM FOR YOU! YOU HAVE TO SAVE THEM! ACCEPT!_ The voice left again.

"On second thought, I accept. I'd like to be a ninja of Leaf." I said. My ears still ringing. 'What have I done?' I thought.

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><p>AN: So you like? This chappie is sorta giving you a glimpse of her dark past. Just so you know I have the irrational fear of needles too. So… Meh. I'd like to say thanks to my first two reviewers:<p>

**Littlebirdd-** Thank you for the tips! The Mary-Sue disease must be eliminated!

**NoIdea135- ** I know she is a loud mouth, but it's her way of well doing things I suppose. You're right pairing should probably wait… So it has been decided!

Thank you for your reviews!


	3. To Become A Ninja

AN: I'm back! Again! I just love the love so I'm updating again. And the ideas are just flowing right now… and I have nothing else to do. So ya. This is for my favorites NoIdea135 and Littlebirdd. You could be my favorite too if you review! So review! Reviews are love! Roll camera! To the Future!

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><p>"Wonderful! However, we need to test your skills… What is your rank?" He asked smiling. Well, the truth hasn't failed me yet so…<p>

"Oh, I'm not a ninja." I said, Sai Smile is a go. His smile dropped.

"I thought we were over with the lies, Thunda." He stated. Grr… What was the point of asking me a question if you're not gonna listen to the answer?! I swear the teachers back home did the same damn thing!

**(~FLASHBACK! Eight Year Old Thunda~)**

"Oh? And, where exactly is your homework, Ms. Arafa?" Mrs. Carey asked. I always hated her she yelled at everyone in the class when she was frustrated and everything had to be her way or no ones way.

"Umm… My little brother got ahold of it and thought it needed color, so… he colored it?" I squeaked. It was true, Evan was in the "I need to give EVERYTHING more color" stage and I had left my homework out so naturally...

"Lies! You were to lazy to do it. Such shame to blame it on a baby." The Meanie! I was on the verge of tears. I didn't like being called lazy, and what's worse is that everyone was laughing at me! So of course I replied with,

"He's a toddler! And at least I have family! You ran yours away 'cuz you're a witch!" I had tears streaming down my face. The next thing I know is I'm on the floor and my cheek hurts. I hate Mrs. Carey.

**(~END OF FLASHBACK~)**

"I'm not lying, I'm not a ninja." I said seemingly unfazed. He huffed.

"Yes, dear, because an untrained civilian can take down a Jonin with easy." He replied.

"Classic example of the element of surprise, plus he was distracted by his Eternal Rival." I droned. Kakashi twitched.

"He is _not_ my "Eternal Rival." He mumbled and pulled out Icha Icha Paradise. This is one thing I despised about Kakashi while at the same time was amused by it. How confusing… I looked around the room and zeroed in on the bedpan on the floor. Quickly, I grabbed it and hurled it at Kakashi's head, which he dodged.

"Damn it." I whined… Just then it bounced off the wall behind him and smacked him in the back of the head, he dropped the book. I dove for that shit.

"No! Not the book! Please!" He shouted as he noticed. I sprinted to the window, opened it and flung the book out of it. Shock silence.

"NOOO!" Kakashi yelled as he reached the window and looked out.

"Fetch boy." I said in my best Kagome voice. To my surprise, he did, out the window. 'Woah, that was way too easy.' I thought. Sigh. That means he was playing along. I stretched.

"Okay, that was fun… You can come out." I said as I sat back on the bed. No one came out but the old man was giving me the impressed look. Creepy…

"So… Since I don't have any ninja knowledge, what's gonna happen?" I asked, I really don't want to go to the academy, a 16 year old in an elementary school? How embarrassing.

"Well… I don't think the academy is a good idea," He said, deep in thought, "I suppose I could have someone tutor you… You do realize you will be on probation for a while, yes?" He said. I knew it! He was gonna sic someone on me. I hope to God it's not Gai…

"Of course. I have no problem with either of those, but who would be my tutor and is it gonna be the same person who's gonna be watching me?" I asked. Okay, I have to admit… I'm really excited. I get to live in _Naruto_! I don't really like all the death and, well, death but… Of well, I guess.

"I was thinking maybe Kakashi, since you know him so well, or maybe Gai..." He said. Oh. Hell. No.

"Not Bushy Brows. Not happening. My Bullshit fuse is like, four centimeters long, I can't handle… That." I said. It wasn't like I hated him, but he reminded me too much of Kitti… The hokage sighed.

"Very well. Kakashi." He said. I totally knew he was still here. I heard a sigh.

"When can I be released?" I asked. Hospitals make me sick.

"Right now." He said as a nurse walked in with my clothes. Thank God they didn't throw them away. I would have been one pissed off bitch. They left and I got dressed. I noticed that the blood wasn't on my hoodie anymore, nice. When I walked out Kakashi was waiting for me.

"So… Is Thunda really your name?" He asked. Ah. So the interogatting begins.

"Maybe." I said. He sighed.

"Lets play a game," He said, "I ask a question, you ask a question, we should get to know each other." I stopped walking. Him pausing shortly after.

"I'll play your game, but don't lie to me about it's purpose." I stated. I started walking again and he continued.

"Is your name really Thunda?" He asked.

"Nickname. Do you have a genin team?" I asked. I need to know where I am.

"Hmm… No. Why Thunda?" We left the Hospital.

"My friends gave it to my when I was little, one because I yelled a lot, still do. Two, because I was afraid of it. Who where the people who found me?" I asked. He looked at me.

"Asuma, Kurenai, and Gai. Are you really from the Land of Tea?" He asked. We turned a corner.

"You guys will probably send someone to check anyways, no." I said. He stopped.

"Then why did you tell the hokage that you were?" He asked, suspicion in his voice.

"You skipped my question, but whatever. Because he didn't accept my first answer." I said. He paused then pulled me into an alley. But I was ahead of him, I've been yanked into alleys before. I grabbed his wrist, twisted it and then spun him around slamming him into the wall.

"That was rude." I said as I stared him down. I was kinda pissed, to say the least.

"Who are you?" He growled, struggling. I let him go and he turned to me.

"I am exactly who I say I am. You can call me Thunda, I have no intention of telling you my real name, not yet at least. I am from Anchorage, Alaska but you guys didn't like that answer so I said I was from Tea. I am not a ninja, but I do know how to box and kick box, and I know self-defense like the back of my hand. I do not like being touched by other people. You can interpret that however you want." I said as I left the alley, Kakashi slightly delayed.

"You don't take me seriously." I stated.

"Not anymore." He grumbled. The tension was growing. We turned a corner. Tension. Growing.

"_By the time I was your age, I'd give anything, to fall in love truly, was all I could think that's when I met your mother, the girl of my dreams the most beautiful woman, that I'd ever seen.~"_

"_She said, "Boy can I tell you a wonderful thing? I can't help but notice, you're staring at me. I know I shouldn't say this, but I really believe, I can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me.~"_

"_Now, son, I'm only telling you this because life can do terrible things.~"_

"_Now, most of the time we'd have too much to drink and we'd laugh at the stars and we'd share everything too young to notice, and too dumb to care_

_Love was a story that couldn't compare.~"_

"_I said, "Girl, can I tell you a wonderful thing? I made you a present with paper and string. Open with care now, I'm asking you, please. You know that I love you, will you marry me?~"_

"_Now, son, I'm only telling you this because life can do terrible things you'll learn, one day, I'll hope and I'll pray, that God shows you differently.~"_

"_She said, "Boy can I tell you a terrible thing? It seems that I'm sick and I've only got weeks. Please, don't be sad now, I really believe, you were the greatest thing that ever happened to me.~"_

"_Slow, so slow I fell to the ground on my knees.~"_

"_So don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose if you're given the choice, then I beg you to choose to walk away, walk away, don't let her get you. I can't bear to see the same happen to you.~"_

"_Now, son, I'm only telling you this because life can do terrible things.~"_

I stopped singing. People were staring, including Kakashi, then people started to clap and I felt heat rush to my face.

"What language was that?" Kakashi asked me as we walked away.

"English." I said. He looked at me strangely.

"Never heard of it. What was the song about?" He asked.

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><p>AN: Hello ma people! So I wrote this chapter because it was eating away at my soul during school… Yeah. So know our little fighta girl is being taught and stalked by Kakashi! I picked Kakashi, NOT for a pairing, but because I really couldn't see her hanging around anyone else. Gai is out of the picture because he gives me and Thunda nightmares. And I don't really like Asuma, personally. Kurenai's cool and all, but really, where would the story go? Her and her team have barely and screen time. Plus I don't really know where else to put her, there are like NO options… Moving on. Some questions regarding Thunda.<p>

**NoIdea135 - **Yes, she is from Alaska. She took Japanese in high school and some of you may or may not know this, but Alaska has a HUGE Japanese Immersion and Exchange program, so lots of native speakers. Also, she is a little before the formation of Team Seven. And Yes, she took Kakashi totally by surprise because one, she looks fragile, two, he thought he had her restrained, and three, his attention was divided by Gai. I hope these answers make sense, thank you NoIdea-san.

**Littlebirdd - ** You and NoIdea-san are like my favorites right now, if my stories can make you smile, then I'm doing my job right! Thanks Birdd-san.

**Blackenflames** **- **Now I'm not trying to be mean or anything but… I utterly despise Duck-Ass, and I agreed with NoIdea-san that pairing should wait awhile, so… yeah. However, I thank you for your opinion and thoughts Flames-san.

**Silima - **Yeah, she's a little PTSD, and bipolar… she finds certain things that would make a normal person freak out normal, and vice versa. I hope people read the authors note so I don't have to explain that in the story, that would be difficult… But! Thank you for the review Silima-san.

**YellowKiiro - **Thanks. You are not the only person to say that, my sister thinks the same thing… Hmm… Anyways, that you for the review Kiiro-san!

Also, the song is Terrible Things by Mayday Parade. It's a good song, you should listen to it. I just added it because its been on replay for the past two hours and I like it… ^.^;

**REVIEWS ARE LOVE AND I FEEL THE LOVE!**

-_-_-Azami-_-_- Out!


	4. What time is it!

AN: So I know I have some spelling errors but… I'll deal with those later. Sorry. Also I noticed that lots of people read this but barely anyone REVIEWS! REVIEWS ARE LOVE! Moving on… I know this story might be a little hard to follow sometimes but remember, this is my first time writing for anyone but myself, please be patient with me. So… That's about it! Camera's are rolling. To the Future!

**WARNINGS: MODERATE TO SEVERE SWEARING AND CURSING!**

**ALSO, NARUTO IS KISHIMOTO'S TOY, I'M JUST BREAKING IT!**

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><p>"Wakey, Wakey! It's time for training!" Kakashi yelled in my ear. I pulled a pillow over my head, it's too damn early for this shit. I felt him grab the sheets, and pull. Now I'm on the <em>cold<em> floor in my hoodie and borrowed shorts. The fucka flipped me.

"Hehehe… _Kakashi…_ dear, what time is it?" I asked in an overly sweet voice picking myself up, a dark aura surrounding me. He sweat dropped and mumbled a '4:30'.

"For your sake I hope you mean in the afternoon." I growled. Walking over to the curtains and ripped them open, it's dark outside.

"Hahahaha!" I laughed like a maniac while looking through the mirror. After about a minute of laughing crazily I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Umm… Thunda, are you… okay?" He asked cautiously.

"Okay? Am I okay? The Banshee at least had the decency to wait 'till nine!" I screeched. I grabbed his arm and bit him. Yup, I bit Kakashi Hatake. He yelped and pulled away, I then chased him out of my room. As soon as he was out I slammed the door behind him locking it. I then grabbed the chair from the desk and set it against the door, I walked over to the window and made sure it was locked. It was. Satisfied I grabbed the blanket and jumped back into to bed. I should have asked for my own apartment or something.

"Wake me up at no four-damn-o'clock." I muttered as the Land of Dreams kidnapped me.

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><p>And so, 8:30 rolled around and I decided it was time to get up and train. I walked over to the door and removed the chair and unlocked the door. I opened it to Kakashi.<p>

"Hatake." I greeted. I was still pissed, believe me. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"I've been calling you." He stated.

"Hn." I grunted and walked passed him to the bathroom, slamming the door. Quickly, I took a shower and then dried myself with one of the towels. I then walked back to my room and closed and locked the door again. I checked the closet and under the bed, just in case. I closed the curtains and got dressed in my old clothes. Not my idea of hygiene but I don't have any other clothes. I walked out of my room and to the kitchen, passing the living room where Kakashi was located. As I entered the kitchen I opened a cabinet to rice, rice, and more rice. Is this all he eats?! I tried another cabinet and found a couple boxes of cereal, I grabbed one at random and put it on the table. I walked over to the fridge and was able to find the milk… by the smell. I grabbed it and read the date.

"Hatake, what day is it?" I asked reluctantly.

"October 10th, why?" He said/asked. The date is August 3rd. I made a sound of disgust. And threw it away.

"What did you throw away?" He asked, almost sounding annoyed.

"Solid milk." I replied.

_October 10th! _The Voice yelled.

'Who are you?! Seriously, it's driving me crazy!' I thought furiously.

_I am what I appear to be. _It replied.

'Ya 'cuz that totally answers my question!'

_I can't tell you yet…_ And again the Voice faded. October 10th? What is that supposed to mean? 10… 10… Naruto's birthday! Is he who I'm supposed to save? It would make a ton of sense. Didn't he get beat on his birthday? Not anymore! Time to screw up the plot slightly! Yay! Sarcasm. Anyway, I'm stuck eating dry cereal.

"Do you have a grocery list?" I asked. He walked into the kitchen with an anger mark on his forehead.

"Are you going to apologize for biting me?" He asked. Ah, he's mad about the bite.

"Are you going to apologize for waking me up so early, and flipping me outta bed?" I asked in an even tone. And thus began the Olympic Stare-off. I won, of course.

"No, why would I need a grocery list?" He asked.

"Oh, I don't know… For groceries!" He sighed and pulled out some paper and a pen and gave them to me.

"I'm going shopping tonight, so I need money." I said, while writing things down.

"How much?" He said with a sigh. Hmm… assuming the conversion is the same as yen…

"11,000." I said, rounding. His eyes widen.

"How much are you getting?!" He asked, well, more like shouted.

"The basics." I said.

"And they are..?"

"Fruits, vegetables, dairy products, meat, maybe juice. And I need new clothes and… girl items." I said. This guy… He sighed in defeat.

"I'll give you the money after training." He said. I finished the cereal.

"Fine." I said as I followed him out of the apartment.

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><p>As we arrive at the training ground, Kakashi turns to me and asks,<p>

"So what do you usually do for training?" I think about it.

"In a day, about 1000 push-ups, 1500 sit-ups, 800 pull-ups, and I run about 20 miles, that's not including yoga." I said.

"Oh god, the female version of Gai…" My eyes widen.

"Do. Not. Compare me with that… Guy." (Pun intended) I said. He laughs.

"Alright, get started then, do your usual, then we'll spar and work on your chakra control." He said. Pulling out his book. An anger mark appeared on my forehead.

"Hatake… Put the book away and train with me or I'll burn it." I said. His eyes narrowed, but he put it away and started his exercises.

Three hours later, those exercises are done and it's time for the spar. We walk to the center of the grounds and drop into fighting stances. He raises an eyebrow.

"What style is that?" He asked. My stance is a standard boxers stance. My left foot is extended about a foot away in front of me, toes pointing toward Kakashi. My right is under me a little to the right, pointing a little off to the side. Both knees slightly bent and I'm on the balls of my feet. My back is bent only a little, and I'm turned to the side just barely. My elbows are turned inward to protect my ribs and my fists in front of my cheek bones.

"Boxers Style, I guess." I said.

"What's a 'boxer'?" He asked.

"Fight me and you'll see." I stated, getting ready to fight Kakashi Hatake. An anime character I admired for his wit and achievements. An anime character… No a person. This is real, it has to be. At that moment he _moved._ He was fast, too fast. I wasn't able to defend so I was hit from behind, the corner of my rib. And it _Hurt._ Probably pay back for biting him. But I was pissed. Moving faster than I thought possible for myself I sent a roundhouse kick to his head. It only clipped, but I still made some contact. He jumped back.

"That was faster than I expected." he said, holding a hand to his bleeding head. Might have been harder than I thought. Then as quick as lightning, he was right in front of me sending a jab to my solar plexus. He wasn't even trying to pull these punches. I was thrown back a couple feet and I landed on my back, coughing and gasping for air. I tasted copper and salt in my mouth, I spit it out and stood back up.

"Oops… Maybe I over did it… We should sto-" I interrupted him.

"Oh. Hell. No. You mothafucka." I panted. He looked shocked.

"No really Thunda. I should probably take you to the hospital." I ran at him, red overtaking my vision. This has happened once before, on _that night_. I can't control myself, but I'm faster and a little stronger. I'm upon him is seconds. I swept his legs out from under him and he lands on his back. He tries to roll away but I'm on top of him, my knees pinning his arms down and I start wailing on him. Left. Right. Left. Left. Right. Left. Left. Right. Right. Repeat. His face is covered in blood, too shocked to teleport away. _Blood._

"Stop!" I yell at myself, I realize tears are coming down my face and I roll off him and just lay there. He scrambles away from me spitting out blood. I simply stare at the sky blankly, tears running down my face as a horribly familiar scene plays out once again in my head. _Blood, death, screams, more blood, _and then black as I passed out.

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><p>I woke up to white. The <em>Hospital.<em> I look at my arm, no needles. 'Kakashi hates me.' I thought as memories come flooding back to me. I look out the window, judging by the sun it's about four in the afternoon. 'Please dear god let it be the same day! Naruto…' I thought. Just then a nurse walked in, saw that I was awake, and swiftly walked out. A few minutes later she opened the door and let Kakashi in. I looked away, ashamed. From what I saw though, a Medic-nin must have fixed him up because he only had a few band-aids.

"Thunda, are you okay?" He asked, and he actually sounded concerned. 'Am I okay? Why is he concerned about me?! I practically smashed his face in!' I thought. So confused.

"_I'm sorry! I didn't mean to do that! Please don't hate me!" _I yelled… In English.

"Umm… what? Oh no, do you have a concussion?!" He yelled, face full of worry now. Oops…

"No, I don't have a concussion… I said I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that, I couldn't control my body. Please don't hate me…" I said tears threatening to spill.

"Calm down, Thunda. It's okay… I'm a Jonin I can handle it… Besides, I was only supposed to test you, but instead… Nevermind." He said turning away.

"You, you were crying before you blacked out… Would you like to explain that?" He asked. Changing the topic.

"No, not yet… I'd rather not." I said staring at my hands. He sighed.

"Okay, well I went shopping today like you wanted… I had Kurenai pick out some clothes for you, they should fit. I hope that's okay." He said.

"It's fine, thanks." I said, "Please tell me it's still the 10th." I said. He looked at me and nodded.

"Yes, and you're allowed to leave when you wake up." He said moving towards the door. Realizing I was still in my clothes I got up and walked to the door and left too. Passing by him I said,

"I'm going for a walk, won't be back till late." Looking at the floor I walked out of the hospital and started my search for the orange ball of sunshine know as Naruto.

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><p>AN: So I hope you all liked this! Seriously guys… Have you ever had your mom chase you around with a spray bottle for half an hour? I ended up outside in nothing but a long nightshirt and slippers. Also, it snowed last Monday, so yup! One of my friends is always like "OH MY GOD! HAPPY 5TH DAY OF WINTER!" *Bunny hops everywhere*. I had to go to the dentist this morning at like 7-freaking-30, so tired! Stupid shots, so now I have numb-tongue and I keep biting myself. I'd like to know if my writing needs work so REVIEW! <strong>REVIEWS ARE LOVE AND I LOVE THE LOVE!<strong>

**_-_-_-Azami-_-_-_ OUT!**


	5. RAMEN!

AN: *!Squeals!* I love you alls! I swear if I just get one review each chapter this story wOULD never end! So today I was woken up by a surprise visit by three cousins. They are triplets and while I love them to bits I find it hard to love them when they burst into my room screaming their heads off. Anyways… I had the Flu and was literally in a comatose state for three days, I didn't wake up, eat, drink, go to the bathroom… I just slept for three days. Lets just say, make-up homework. T.T Roll cameras! To the Future!

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><p>Finding Naruto was ten times harder than I thought it was going to be… Mostly because I wasn't using my brain and kept looking in the wrong places. Why the hell would he be in a dumpster?! I think the heat is messing with my head. That is until I realized I should probably check the academy because, well, he's an academy student. As I arrived I almost punched myself for being a dumbass and not checking this place first. I say almost because I most definitely would have had I not seen something that made my blood freeze, boil, then stop all in three seconds. On the ground, no more than six yards from where I stood, was a eleven year-old-today blonde boy getting his guts kicked out of him, by who I assume to be genin judging by their hitai-ate. And what made it even worse was that the adults around were doing absolutely <em>nothing. <em>Fury overtook me, as images and memories of my early childhood flittered into my vision.

**(~FLASHBACK! Thunda, Six years old, Kindergarten~)**

"Hey! Look it's _Thunda_." A boy my age said in a mocking tone, he had a smirk plastered on his face. A small girl in a blue play dress lowered her head, her bangs covering her eyes.

"What kind of a name is that? You should change it to Shorty or something!" Another said. Others laughed as more kids gathered to watch. My eyes started to water.

'No! I can't cry. I don't want to cry!' I pleaded in my head, I didn't want them to know it hurt because then they'd do it even more.

"Oh no! Look, poor _little_ Thunda's gonna cry." The first boy said. They always made fun of me because I was so small, I hadn't grown much since I was four and they made sure to let me know it. Then they started to kick me, so I tried walking away only for them to trip me. I fell face first on the ground. Why were kids so _mean_? They started kicking me again and laughing. That is until another girl, wearing a red tanktop and light blue shorts stepped in. Myira Anne, was her name, we had met the first day of school a while back. I remember smiling at her and introducing myself like Ma taught me to, only for her eyes to widen then she quickly run away. I hadn't talked to her much after that, but I made sure to smile at her every time I saw her. She looked really mad, but she took everyone by surprise when she screamed, "GET OFF MY FRIEND!" She then launched herself at one of the boys and proceeded to bite him. We both ended up in the principals office, with me being the witness. She hadn't said a word to me the whole time.

"Did ya mean it?" I asked her. She looked at me confused.

"Did ya mean it when ya said I was your friend?" I asked again.

"Yeah! Of course we're friends! Who else would I bite someone for?" She asked. I didn't quite hear I was too busy in LALA Land. _I have a friend!_

**(~FLASHYBACK END~)**

I ran over to the little blonde, he was really small for his age, probably from only eating ramen. I put myself in between Naruto and the genin.

"Hey! Get out of the way Civie!" One of them yelled at me. Tch.

"Make me brats! Who the hell do you think you are?!" I let something off that I hadn't felt before instantly the genin froze up. They didn't respond.

'This must be Killing Intent… I like it.' I thought. Now, I am a sixteen year old girl. I cannot bite children like someone I know (Myira), and I refuse to get mixed in with the Pedo-Sannin and give kids Hickeys of Doom. So I simply picked Naruto up, gave the brats a bone frying glare and walked away. Swiftly, I walked into the small wooded area by the academy and disappeared. After a couple of minutes I stopped and put the kid down to take a look at him. Naruto was out cold, but I expected that. What I didn't expect however, was the black, purple, and blue bruises _all over_ him. First Aid class kicked into overdrive. I checked his breathing, breathing somewhat shallow, I need to get him to a hospital. Since I had already moved him a first time I figured it would be okay to move him a second time if I was gentle. I picked him up again, noting this time that he was really light. I quickly headed in the direction of the hospital, two times was all I needed to remember where it was. When I entered the hospital I noticed all the nurses look at me, but when they saw who I was carrying they didn't give me a second thought.

'What the hell?! Don't these guys have something like the Hippocratic Oath?!' I thought, disappointed. I walked over to the closest nurse.

"Excuse me? This boy need medical attention." I said to her. She sneered at me.

"He's fine! He doesn't need to be here, please leave." She stated and turned to walk away, I had other plans.

"Hoe, you will give this boy medical treatment or so help me, I will shove my shoe so far…" I trailed off, she looked pale. It was at that moment that I realized I was sending off waves of Killing Intent. She gasped.

"Right this was, please." She made a beeline for one of the empty rooms.

"You can put him here, please." She pointed to the bed, I layed him down. She's being awfully polite now.

"You can leave, if you want, we'll take go-" I cut her off,

"No that's fine, I'll stay here, at least until his parents can be found. Also, is it possible to let the Hokage know I need to speak with him, I'd like to report misconduct by some his genin." That's right, I can sound official when I want.

"Yes ma'am, the doctor will be here in a moment." She said and left. I looked at Naruto, when this kid wakes up I'm gonna smother him in a hug. Minus all the bruises and he is _adorable!_ I brush a lock of hair out of his eyes. A few minutes pass by and the doctor walks in. A snobby looking lady with pointy glasses and too-red lips, her complexion was a pasty white. I didn't know Pedo-Sannin had a sister. She smelled like an old persons home. Eww.

"Are you the one who let off the Killing Intent?" She sniffed. I nodded.

"This is a hospital, where the injured and sick rest, you can't do that here." She said in a snide voice.

"Listen lady, if that nurse had done her job the first time around and given the kid a room I wouldn't have blown up on her." I said. Sigh. "Please, just heal him." I said to her.

"Fine, but get out, I need room to work." She sneered. Nope. Nuh Uh. Not happening lady. Going over my memories of Sakura on the job, one doesn't need the whole room to work.

"Sorry to say… I don't trust you to not hurt him. Not leaving, you don't need the whole room." I said in a sweet voice. The witch glared at me, but got to work. A few minutes later she was done and she left, closing the door. Just to be sure she didn't do anything to him I checked his vitals. Pulse is normal, breathing returning to normal and… I don't know I'm not a doctor. I sighed in relief. The door opened and the Hokage walked in, his face was one of surprise when he saw me.

"Thunda… What are you doing here?" He asked.

"I'm staying with the kid, making sure he's okay." I said.

"You're the one who found him? How did you come across him?"

"Well you see, I was just walking around when I came to this school, and there he was getting the snot kicked outta him." I said with a shrug. No, it's not like I was looking for him or anything…

"Ah, yes, I received reports of a teenaged girl threatening a couple of genin. They said nothing about Naruto." He said.

"Yeah, I noticed that none of the adults were doing anything about it so… I did." I told him. "Does this happen a lot?" Yes. Yes it does.

"Unfortunately." He said. I sighed. Well… I guess I could take him for ramen, but I don't have any money… Boo. Pouty face is a go.

"What's wrong Thunda?" The Hokage asked me. Oh idea~

"I wanted to take him to get some ramen after he woke up but I don't have any money…"

'Come on! Take da bait!'

"How did you know he like ramen?" He asked me with a leveled gaze.

'Shite! Think! Think… Use your brain!'

"Well, when I was caring him… He smells like ramen." I stated. Which is somewhat true cause I did smell him, I just didn't know what the smell was… It would totally make sense if it was ramen. The Hokage sighed, pulled out a wallet and gave me money… Lots of it. Yay!

"I trust you to take care of him, oh, and get yourself some too." He stood and turned to leave. I stood too and gave him a salute.

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir." He chuckled and left. I sat down next to Naruto, thoughts going ballistic.

'Woohoo! I get to eat ramen with NARUTO! HAHAHAHA! Wee!~' Then the witch-nurse walked in and said,

"When he wakes up, get out." She then turned and left, slamming the door. Okay, she is now on my "Kill List" along with Pedo-Sannin, Kabuto, Madara, Tobi, Zetsu and Gatou. Apparently the door woke Naruto up, because the next thing I hear is,

"Ahhh! Who are you?!" Well… he's… loud.

"Thunda! You?!" I yelled back with a smile on my face.

"N-naruto." He stuttered. He's _sho_ cute!

"Sup' Naruto, ya wanna go get ramen?" His eyes sparkled.

"Yes!" He shouted with glee. I need to teach this to not take food from strangers… Oh well, that can wait!

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><p>AN: Thoughts? Come on people, help a girl out. Anyways, should I keep doing flashbacks? I don't know but I don't think I'm doing it right.<p>

So today in my Japanese class one of my classmates (whom I will not name) brought her 7 week old puppy with her to class. His name was Copper and he was SHO CUTE! OMG! We had to hide him from the security guards and other teachers (Miyu-sensei was in on it.). She would stuff him under her scarf and freeze it was kinda funny. But, yeah, that's all…

REVIEWS ARE LOVE AND I LOVE THE LOVE! SO REVIEW!


	6. Moose and Bears

AN: So I wanna make it up to you guys for updating late. Any ideas? I was thinking about doing an omake but I wanted to ask you guys. Also, I was thinking about doing another story because I have (What I think) a great idea for another Fic. But I want to know what you think, either PM me or review. Okay that's all. Roll camera's! To the future!

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><p>When we arrived at Ichiraku's Naruto was basically bouncing off the metaphorical walls. He was so happy that it was making me happy. How could anyone be so mean to him? He's practically a ball of happiness! And also, it always bothered me of how <em>no one<em> could figure out who his father was. I mean, Hell, a monkey with half a brain and a picture could probably figure it out. But I digress. When I sat down next to him, Teuchi gave me a look of suspicion. I just smiled at him.

"Can I have the Miso Ramen, please?" I asked politely. Naruto, however.

"Gimme seven of the Miso Ramen too, old man!" He yelled. I was kinda shocked at how… rude he was to one of the only people who cared about him, but I was expecting it. Teuchi just smiled and nodded and set to work on our food.

"So, Naruto, care to explain why I found you getting your guts kicked out?" I asked.

"Uhhh… well, I only told them that one day I'm gonna be Hokage… And I am, dattebayo! Then they came after me…" He said, looking a little sad as he finished. I nodded.

"Well, when your Hokage be sure to be nice to them." I said. He gave me a weird look.

"You're… Not going to say… My dreams impossible?" He asked.

"Of course not. What kind of a big sister would I be if I thought something like that? Besides, you're really smart, you just don't know how to use your talents." I said to him, finishing with a wise nod.

"Big sister?!" He said with eyes so hopeful it make me sad. A kid should be pushing away that kind of blunt affection, at least from my experience, not begging for it.

"Mhmm. Big sister. I'm unofficially adopting you as my little brother." I said. Teuchi, I could see, smiled at that as he finished making our food.

"So, Naruto, who's your friend?" He asked. Naruto, snapping out of his daze, looked at Teuchi with a huge grin.

"This is Thunda! My new big sister!" He yelled. Teuchi gave me my food first, with a smile.

"Really, now? Well, Thunda, I'd ask that you take care of my Number One Customer. He said.

"Of course! It's my job as big sister!" I said. We talked like that until Naruto finished his food. Then I paid and we left, it was getting kinda late.

"Hey Naruto, where do you live?" I asked, he froze.

"Uhh… Well you see… Can you not come over today? This morning when I woke up there was a little… birthday present." He said. I stopped. What. The. Fuck. Did. They. Do?!

"Naruto, sweetheart, where do you live?" I said in a deadly sweet voice and sickening smile.

"Umm… This way." He said. When we arrived, I was PISSED. All over the walls was written things like 'GO DIE DEMON!' or, 'CRAWL BACK TO YOUR FILTHY WHORE OF A MOTHER' things like that. If Kushina read the last one she'd have the ass. I, however, was the one who read it so in her stead, I said,

"Okay, Naruto, you're spending the night with me. No buts now." I said, grabbing his hand, turning around and walking away.

"Thunda-nee-chan, no! It's fine!" He said. That's it.

"It is not fine! It's not fair that you have to be treated like this!" I yelled, hugging him tight, "I don't trust that you're going to be safe tonight! So you're going to stay with me. I live with a Jonin. I kinda pissed him off this morning… But I don't care, I'll deal with him later." I finished, panting.

"Okay, Nee-chan." He said quietly. I nodded and continued to drag him to Kakashi's apartment. When we got there I walked in quickly, Naruto trailing hesitantly.

"Thunda… What are you doing?" Kakashi said, stepping out of the shadows.

"Kakashi, it is taking _all_ of my self-control to not knock your lights out, don't scare me like that." I said, clenching my fist.

"Maa, sorry. Umm… Thunda, who is that?" He asked, pointing to Naruto. I rolled my eyes.

"My little brother, duh!" I said.

"Little… Brother?" He asked.

"Yup, I adopted him, so he's spending the night. Also, I going to have to beg out of tomorrow, I have to help him out with something." I said. As much as I hate chores, my Naru-bro is not living in an apartment that looks like that.

"While that's all fine and good, where is he going to sleep?" Kakashi asked. This whole conversation, Naruto has been standing there looking like the physical embodiment awkward.

"With me." I said. +50 points of awkward.

"Thunda… He can't sleep with you, you're a girl, he's a boy." I stare at him.

"He's… Eleven, Kakashi. You do realize." I said with an emotionless tone. He sweatdropped. I sighed.

"Look, I'm going to go get ready for bed, Naruto, you're coming with me." I said and walked to my room, Naruto followed. Once there I closed the door and I took off my sweater and… jumped into bed. I have new clothes, but no PJ's.

"Come on cute! It's bedtime! I don't have any PJ's for you… Wait." I said, crawling over to the foot of my bed, I see bags of clothes. Reminder: Apologize to Asuma for punching him and thank Kurenai. I pulled out a white T-shirt, it's my size so it'll fit him fine. I threw it at him.

"Put this on and I'll tell you a story about my hometown." I said. He nodded with a smile and striped down to his boxers, then put on the shirt. Then he too jumped on the bed, we sat across from each other. I knew Kakashi was listening in so I decided to mock his stealth.

"Hatake, didn't you know eavesdropping is rude? You wanna listen to the story get in here and sit down." I said. He guiltily walked in, rubbing the back of his head.

"Maa... " He said, but cut himself off after a glare from me and sat down.

"Okay, the place I used to live was way further up north than we are, but not far enough because the summers were really hot. We didn't have many poisonous bugs or reptiles… We had bears and moose." I said, remembering Alaska.

"What's a moose?" Naruto asked. I sighed, then got off the bed.

"They're about this tall." I held my hand far above my head. "And they're about as long as the wall… and typically, they're docile, might even let you pet them… However, if you get too close to them… They'll stomp your as-butt, butt, I said butt." I said quickly, remembering my audience. To say they were stunned would be an understatement.

"That's huge!" Naruto yelled.

"Yeah." Was Kakashi's response. I sat back down.

"Yup. Bears are bigger and they'll eat you." I said, " But you don't have to worry about that Naruto." I said, noticing his fear. I could almost smell it, which is odd… because it shouldn't have scared him that much…

"Anyways, In the winter it snows like, ten feet and it's really cold and wet and slippery… I never liked winter." I said. "But I was going to tell you guys about the Wars me and my friends used to have. When my f- I mean, when I was younger, me and my friends would challenge the boys of the neighborhood to a War. There would usually be about four teams each against each other. We'd have one day to prepare at a location, usually a forested area." I explained.

"Did the guys win? They won didn't they?" Naruto asked excited. Boy, it does not take much with this kid.

"Actually… Me and my girls kick but, each and every time. See, we picked the battleground, therefore we prepped it ahead of time and they always fell in to our traps. Or they got pelted by paint balloons." I said, smiling at the memory.

"Where are your friends now?" Kakashi asked. I hate him right now.

"Uhh… They're back home…" I said, rubbing the back of my head.

"You're lying." He said.

"No she's not! Why would she lie about that!" Naruto yelled at him. Good boy.

"Thunda." Kakashi said.

"Hey Naruto, pick a side, I need to go get some water." I said. He nodded and smiled, oblivious. As I left the room, Kakashi followed.

"So, where are they really? Are they here? Is that why you needed to go for a walk to day?" He asked, suspicious. Of course he'd think that.

"No, no. They're not here." I said.

"Then where are they? They're not 'back home'." He said

"It doesn't matter." I said, and tried going back to my room, but Kakashi stopped me.

"It does matter. Where are they? If you don't tell me I'll be forced to hand you over to T&I." He threatened. This bitch.

"You know, when I first met you I thought you were a cool guy. Now, I think you're a coward, a prick, and a depressed loser," I said, looking him in the eye, " I know how to read people, Kakashi, and I'm not stupid. I listen to people, what they say. I observe, especially when I'm in unfamiliar territory. It's an old habit. I figured out who Naruto is, who he holds. It's a great burden, and it's unfair. I want to level that playing field by being there for him. I know you were his father's student. I know that you chose to run away from your grief. Your social skills are shit and that's coming from me, miss antisocial." I said. His eye was wide.

"Who the hell are you?" He asked. I sighed.

"We've already been over this, I'm not doing it again." I said.

"How did you figure it out?" He asked.

"Kakashi, personally, I think a monkey with half a brain and a picture could figure out who his father was. Also, he was born the night of the attack, yeah? You'd have to be a retard to not make the connection…" I said. I guess he accepted that answer.

"What did you mean by miss antisocial? You had friends right?" He asked. I realized then how tired I was. I sighed.

"Kakashi, I haven't had friends in a long time. Those people I talked about… They're… they can't be here anymore. You interpret that however you want. I'm tired, I'm going to bed." I said and walked away. Leaving a stunned Kakashi. When I entered my bedroom I turned off the lights, Naruto was already out. I smiled and climbed into bed.

"Night, Naru-bro." I said and fell asleep.

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><p>AN: So wha'd ya think? Good? Bad? Too sad? Anyway tell me what you think! REVIEWS ARE LOVE AND I LOVE THE LOVE SO REVIEW! I have a new addition to my favorite reviewers list. Along with NoIdea and Littlebirdd, my new favorite is Silima! Yay.<p>

So ya. Remember I'm thinking about adding a new story but I want thoughts. Also, should I do an omake or do you guys have other ideas? PM me or review it. I always check my reviews. Flamers will be set on fire.

-_-_-Azami-_-_- Out!


	7. Duck-asses and Chores

AN: Next Chappie! Yay! So nothing super interesting going on… yet. So I'll just head to the story. Cameras are a go! TO THE FUTURE!

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><p>I woke up to the sound of an 18 wheeler starting up. Okay, it was Naruto, that snoring can't be healthy. He was on the outside of the bed with me against the wall, the sun was up so I decided it was time for us to get up. I shoved him out of the bed.<p>

"Ahhh!" He screamed as he hit the floor.

"G'morning…" I mumbled and rolled after him, missing him be centimeters. I made an 'Oof' sound when I hit the floor.

"Nee-chan! What the heck?!" He yelled in my ear. I grabbed a pillow and shoved it on his face.

"Naru… I love you more than you know… But, sweetie, don't yell in my ear. It won't end well." I said and lifted the pillow… to a crying Naruto. Shit, what did I say?

"Ya love me? Really? Dattebayo." He said. Ah, it was that.

"Of course. I am your big sister… and you're adorable. Why wouldn't I love ya?" I asked, though I think I already know the answer.

"B-Because, everyone else hates me…" He said.

"Naru, stop crying, it makes me sad. You may not know this, but I'm not everyone else. In fact I pride myself in being the farthest thing from 'Everyone'. So get that out of your head. Those other people, they just don't understand. They don't understand and as humans the thing they don't understand, they fear. You just need to make them understand you. No come on, get dressed. We have an apartment to clean." I said. Naruto smiled and jumped up to put his clothes on.

'He bounces back fast.' I thought. I walked over to my new clothes, pulled out a plain T-shirt and pair of shorts, then sandals. I walked out of my room and to the bathroom. I walked in closed the door, stripped and put on the new clothes. I'll take a shower when I get back. After leaving the bathroom I walked to where I knew Kakashi was: the livingroom, reading.

"Kakashi, money, please." I said and held out my hand. He sighed.

"Do I wanna know?" He asked not looking at me. Probably cuz' I chewed him out last night. .

"Nope." I said. He sighed again and gave me some money.

"Danke." I said.

"What?" He said.

"Nothing." I replied.

"Naruto! Come on, let's go!" I yelled. Said boy came running at me and attached himself to my side.

"Here!" He yelled.

"Let's go." I said and dragged him out of the apartment.

"Bye, Kakashi!" I said as I closed the door. We headed toward Naruto's apartment but stopped at Ichiraku's for a quick breakfast, Naruto was upset that I only let him get one bowl.

"Naruto, I know you love this stuff, and while I agree that it's delicious, it can't be that healthy for you. Do you ever want to have a growth spurt?" I asked. He stared at me with his mouth open. Eww.

"Oh god! Close the mouth kid! That's nasty." I said and closed my eyes. I heard the click of his mouth as he shut it.

"Okay, I lost my appetite." I shuddered. Naruto had a sheepish grin on his face as he rubbed the back of his head.

"Sorry Nee-chan." He said and he quickly finished his bowl.

"Thanks for the food, Jiji." I said and out money on the counter. Last night Teuchi said it was okay for me to call him that, since I was his Number One Customer's big sister.

"Come again." He said with a nod. After that, we headed to Naruto's apartment. However, we ran into someone I didn't want to meet this early on. Duck-ass. Why the hell was he here?! Naruto saw him so of course he had to start screaming at him. I didn't react fast enough to stop him. I was fast enough to stop him from bolting though.

"Nee-chan, what is it?" He asked. Sasuke saw me trying to grab him and run so he just had to come over. Oh god! I'm totally going to blow up on this kid. I hated Sasuke… He just pissed me off. He had just about everything, fangirls, good teachers, a whole fucking village at his beck and call. But! Get this, the only thing on his mind was following his psychotic brothers instructions by getting revenge. The Uchiha's were crazy, I suppose. I just can't say anything to him and everything will be fine, smile and wave. I pulled on the fakest smile I could.

"Hn. Dobe, who is this?" Duck-ass asked. He did not just call my Naru-bro a dobe! I mean, I know he does it all the time in the anime, but hearing it in person really pisses me off.

'Self-control~ Self-control~ Have to keep my self-control~' I sung inside my head.

"This is Thunda-nee-chan! Dattebayo!" He said proudly and with a big grin. My fake smile became a slightly more real one.

"She's not your sister. You two look nothing alike." Sasuke stated like the asshole he was. Naruto's grin dropped at that. That's it. Fuck self-control!

"M'kay, listen here, Duck-ass. I know the whole fucking village just adores you, and you think that just because you're an Uchiha that you're all that and a bowl of ramen. But, let me tell you right now. You're not. Don't think that you can go around, saying whatever the hell you want. You can't. Naruto, is my little brother. Hurt him in anyway ever again, and I'll kick your ass. Clear? Good." I said. I realized then that I had released Killing Intent and had sent it directly at Duck-ass, who was frozen in fear, wide-eyed. I know I shouldn't pick on little kids, and that Duck-ass hasn't had the best of lives, but I really don't care. Someone needs to knock some sense into the little idiot. I drought the Killing Intent back in and sighed.

"Come on, Naruto. Let's go." I said quietly. I grabbed his hand and we walked away. Leaving a frozen Uchiha in our wake.

"That was awesome! You totally told him off! He was terrified of you!" Naruto yelled full of excitement.

"Yup. Naruto, if anyone else ever picks on you again, tell me. I'll take care of it." I said. He nodded.

"Okay!" He said. When we got the apartment, it was worse. The windows were broken and even more graffiti was on the walls. I sighed. We walked into the apartment and broke out the cleaning supplies. After a while I… smelled a familiar scent. Which was so weird, because I don't remember my sense of smell being this strong. It took me a couple seconds to realize who it was. Duck-ass. A few more seconds and his smell got stronger and a could hear him breathing and his footsteps.

'The fuck? Since when was my hearing so good?!' I thought. After years of listening to an iPod on full blast, your hearing isn't that awesome. All of a sudden, everything came into super focus. I could see the tiny dust particles floating around in the air. I could hear the conversation a couple were having down the street. I could smell Naruto's and Sasuke's shock as I collapsed, holding my head. I could feel the texture of the oil in my hair, and I could taste the stale air coming from Naruto's apartment. My mind couldn't take the sudden influx of information and was shutting down. I could feel something wet drip down my nose. Blood. I fainted.

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><p>AN: Le gasp! I know this chapter was shorter than the others but… I'm the author! Hahaha! She has a new ability! Yay! Personally, I didn't think super senses was an OP character power. Just me. So what did you guys think? Good, not good? What? REVIEWS ARE LOVE AND I LOVE THE LOVE SO REVIEW!<p>

_-_-_Azami_-_-_ Out!


	8. I Love Hospitals! Really!

AN: HEYO! NEW CHAPPY! YAY! So ya… PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! THIS WAS A DREAM I HAD (Well sorta… Different people and all.) AND I THOUGHT IT BE GOOD IN THIS STORY SO DON'T KILL ME PLEASE! NO FLAMERS!

DISCLAIMER: I OWN THE PAJAMAS NOT THE ACTUAL THING!

WARNING: Language and stuff. Don't like don't read. RANT FOR SOMEONE WHO WON'T GET THE MESSAGE AND LEAVE ME ALONE: To a certain ass who PMed me about how shitty you think my story is, AND WON'T STOP SENDING THEM! Get a life, I don't care and don't bring my mother into your shit.

Sorry everyone. Cameras are a go. TO THE FUTURE!

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><p>"You must like this hospital, a lot." Kakashi said with, what I have to assume because of the damn mask, a grin.<p>

"Yes, I love how all the white replicates the feeling of the impending afterlife." I said in a bored tone. After I fainted Naruto and Duck-ass kinda started to freak out and after a few minutes a passing chunin heard them and came to investigate, finding me on the ground. He brought me to the hospital along with Naruto and Duck-ass, who are both sitting in the chairs in my hospital room. I don't know why Duck-ass is still here, I thought I scared him off… Apparently not. While they were waiting for the nurse to finish with me, I was still out the whole time, the chunin asked Naruto and Duck-ass if I had any family and Naruto came up with, you guessed it, Kakashi.

"How many times has she been here?" Duck-ass asked in his broody voice.

"Well, three, and she's only been here about four days." Kakashi replied. Both boys looked at me with wide eyes, well Naruto did, Duck-asses just widened a little then when back to normal.

"Why?" Naruto asked. Why, little brother, did you have to ask?

"Mostly fainting… First Kakashi's Eternal Rival gave me a panic attack, then… Stuff happened at the training ground and now this." I said with a shrug.

"I told you already! He's not my Eternal Rival!" Kakashi yelled at me. At that moment the door open and revealed the Hokage.

"It's good to see you awake Thunda, again." He said with a small chuckle. He walked over to the last vacant chair and sat down. The boys were slightly shocked at the Hokage's appearance.

"Hey, Jiji. What are you doing here?" Naruto asked. Everyone was even more shocked at Naruto's lack of respect, well, except for me and maybe Kakashi, it's hard to tell.

"I'm just here to ask Thunda about what happened. Why don't you and your friend go wait outside, Naruto?" The Hokage asked. Naruto whined a little, but left along with Duck-ass.

"So, what happened?" He asked me after putting up privacy seals. Kakashi leaned in to listen.

"Umm… Well I'm not really sure why it matters… But, I was helping Naruto clean up his apartment from… last nights events, when all my senses went into overdrive. It was too much for me to handle and I fainted." I said.

"Your senses went into overdrive?" Kakashi asked.

"Yeah, but before that I was able to smell Duck-ass, who was hiding behind a wall spying on us, and hear his breathing and footsteps…" I said.

"Duck-ass?" The Hokage asked.

"Yeah, Sasuke. I call him Duck-ass." I said.

"Why?" He asked, furrowing his brow.

"The back of his head looks like a ducks ass." I said with a shrug. Kakashi snickered at that.

"How did you know what he smelled like beforehand and why was he following you?" He asked.

"Umm… Well, me and Naruto ran into him on the way to the apartment and he kinda pissed me off so I might have released some Killing Intent on him… But either way I was able to smell him. Why he was following us, I have no idea." I said.

"Why were you helping Naruto clean his apartment?" Kakashi asked. I gave him a look.

"You don't know? Really? The kid gets beat on the street on a regular and every year on his Birthday… People vandalize his apartment." I said. Kakashi didn't give a reaction, probably because he knew.

"No, I mean why did you help him?" He asked. I gave an exasperated huff.

"I thought we already went over this. No brother of mine is living in a trashed apartment." I said.

"Brother?" The Hokage asked.

"Yes, brother. I adopted him yesterday." I said with a grin.

"I see… That's another thing. I dispatched anbu to watch him last night, as I do every year. But they had difficulty finding him. I was worried." He said, expecting an answer.

"They really couldn't find him? Wow, well at least it worked." I said.

"What worked?" He asked.

"Well, he spent the night at Kakashi's place with me because I didn't want him to get hurt. So if even the anbu couldn't find him, it worked." I said. The Hokage nodded.

"About that," Kakashi said. " She knows who he is, the whole deal." He said. Thanks for screwing me over, jackass. The Hokage gave me a look that would have had normal people shaking. I, however wasn't fazed.

"Explain." He demanded in a cold voice. I sighed.

"Explain now or I'll turn you over to T&I for interrogation." He threatened. Now that really pissed me off.

'These motherfucking assholes! I've had enough of this shit! Why do they think they need to threaten me?' I thought. I felt a pressure in my head, almost like a headache but not really.

"Thunda, this isn't a game. You're hiding something and I want to know what." The Hokage said.

'Why don't they trust me?! Not even a little? I've done nothing to deserve this treatment.' I thought, my anger still rising.

"You're. An. Asshole." I said. Then, shit got real. The window blew out, the machines that weren't even turned on short-circuited, and the frame of my hospital bed bent in on itself.

'Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy fucking shit!' I thought, looking around.

"I didn't do it!" I screamed as my hands shot up. The Hokage and Kakashi just stared at me, or that's what I thought until Kakashi said,

"Where did she go?!" Umm… Right here? Kakashi went over to the window.

"I don't see her." He said.

"I'm right here." I said, but it was like they didn't hear me.

"What? Am I invisible?" I asked and looked down at my hands.

"Holy fuck! I'm invisible!" I screamed. I had on idea what was happening.

'Please be a dream!' I thought as I materialized again. Kakashi had a kunai at my throat.

"What the hell just happened and where did you go?" He asked.

"One, get the kucking knife out of my face. Two, I have no idea. In fact, I'm using all my self-control to not faint right now, cause I just disappeared1" I screamed and closed my eyes.

'I wish that didn't happen." I thought when I opened my eyes the room was back to the way it was before everything went to hell.

"Explain now or I'll turn you over to T&I for interrogation." He threatened. This time, however, I was in too much shock to be pissed. So I went on autodrive, you know, the lights are on but no one's home?

"I, umm… put… two and two together… and got Naruto…" I said absentmindedly, looking around the room.

'The hell just happened.' I thought.

I have granted your first wish, but for now just answer his questions. We will talk later. And the Voice was gone. Thanks for FREAKING ME OUT MORE!

"Elaborate." He said. I sighed.

"Look, let's just say a monkey with half a brain and a picture could figure it out. Naruto was the only kid born on October 10th right? I don't know a lot about sealing, but I know the principals." I said. After answering a few more questions they left me alone. However, I have to stay at the hospital for a day, which sucks. Until Voicy payed a visit.

You have questions? It asked.

'No shit. What the hell happened?' I asked

Watch your mouth. Which part, the episode at Naruto's or the hospital?

'Both." I thought with a frustrated tone.

Your senses have been heightened, though as you have noticed, only your sense of smell is permanent. You can't turn it off like the rest. When you were with Naruto, you smelled Sasuke and you wanted to know more, so you unconsciously turned on all your other senses at once. Causing you to faint. She said.

'Why are my senses heightened?' I asked.

To make your job easier.

'Okay, what about the hospital?'

Psychokinesis, another ability to make your job that much easier. Though it can be heavily influenced by your emotions, making it difficult to use in battle.

'Okay… and after that?'

You wished for it to not happen, so it didn't. You only have two wishes left.

'Okay, fine. But tell me who you are.' I demanded.

Sorry. I can't yet. Good bye. She said and left.

"Damn it! I didn't ask her about the invisibility!" I screamed, then quickly covered my mouth and waited for a nurse to come in and ask me what I was screaming about. After a few moments I relaxed. I decided to practice that psycho-whatever. Across the room was a pen on a desk, so I tried picking it up. Nope. It wouldn't move. How the hell do I move a pen without touching it?! Wait. I'm probably just losing my mind… Oh, wait, that already happened. So I spent 38 minutes trying to move it… with my mind. But nothing.

'Ha! I was actually expecting something!' I sighed and stared at the ceiling.

"Is it broken?" I asked aloud. No response. Nope, I'm just nuts. I sighed again.

'There has to be a trick to it.' I thought. Then I tried imagining that I was over there picking up the pen. It worked.

'Half a damn hour and a migraine and all I had to do was that?! God damn...' I thought.

After I was done being mad at myself I tried other things. Soon, I had everything in the room floating in the air. I did that late into the night.

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><p>AN: So..? What good? Not overpowered… or maybe slightly? No flamers! Flamers will be set on fire! So yeah, don't you guys wish you knew who the voice is. We know it's a girl… But WHO?! HAHA! I'm thinking about doing another story because I have (What I think) an awesome idea for one. It's a Naruto fic and one word: Magic. Yes? No? PM or review it! Also, to reviewer Kasai no Oni: She like just developed her super senses, kinda like a delayed reaction I mean, she's only been in the Narutoverse for like four days. She was also super surprised at her sharpened senses, just saying. I hope that clears up your headful of question marks! REVIEWS ARE LOVE AND I LOVE THE LOVE SO REVIEW! NOMNOMNOM!<p>

-_-_-Azami-_-_- Out!


	9. Sorry Guys

Hey guys... For those of you who enjoy this story I am very sorry. I will be temporarily leaving for 2-4 months due to family matters, and other things. Again, I apologize.

UPDATE!

Okay! I have good news and I have bad news! Good news is I'm back from 'Family Matters Island' Yeah! Thank god! Bad news, however, is that I'm broken! This story has died on me and I have moved on the next big thing (In my head). I told you guys beforehand that I have the attention span of a Nat and I'm sorry. I have a new project under way and I think it's better than this story. There is always the possibility that I'll start it up again but don't hold your breath. THANKS! SORRY! FLAMERS WILL BURN! さようなら皆！

-_-_-Azami-_-_-


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